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I miss my Little Girl

By June 4, 2015August 5th, 2016No Comments
Since Kbear was 9 months old, she has been on a sleep schedule/nighttime routine. Every once in a while it changes to adapt to her growth spurts as well as changing seasons but for the most part, we try to make it as similar as possible. It’s a pretty basic schedule and takes at most 30minutes before she’s fast asleep. But, recently she’s been whining before falling asleep. Some nights, it’s because she wants to get in bed with a book while other nights it’s because she doesn’t want me to put a blanket over her. Don’t be worried, the whining lasts for 5min maximum and then she settles down. However last night was a completely different story. I read a book with her as usual and put her in bed with bunny. Put on her night light, gave her a kiss and we did our good night routine. I walked out and closed the door as usual. Then carried on doing what I normally do – washing my face etc. – in preparation to go to sleep but for 1 moment I stopped and watched Kbear through the monitor in our bedroom. She was hugging bunny and singing a song, I couldn’t tell what song it was, all I heard was cute toddler sounds and in that very moment, I missed my lil girl so much. I turned around and went straight into her room. I picked her up and she hugged me so tightly I almost burst into tears. And then I did it, I rocked her to sleep!! As you can imagine, she’s quite tall and so she was struggling to be comfortable but she let me hold her for 15min. Her head lying on my chest, just the way it was moments after she was born. As she was dosing off to sleep, she pointed to her bed showing me that I should tug her in. I complied. I gently laid her on her crib, gave her bunny and covered her with a blanket. As I kissed her, she looked at me with sleepy eyes and touched my cheek and my heart just melted. I don’t know where this comes from but I didn’t realize just how much I miss spending quality time with my daughter until last night. But most of all, I realized just how blessed I am to be her mother and it gives me such joy to see her beautiful lil face every single day.
This is what it feels like to be in love. Because I am a mother and I am proud.